Photo: quinn.anya

Last Friday, I wrote a piece over at BNT called, The Power of Anxiety: 5 Questions to Change Your Life. Gotta admit, I’ve been feeling anxious as of late. A bit trapped. Kinda flailing (or failing).

We all have our ways of dealing with these emotions when they come up, and I bet more than one of you might have the same inclination as me – to run the hell away (though my running away is less of the drinking and drugging variety and more of the actual physically moving to another locale kinda option).

I promised in that piece that I would answer here the questions prompted by Danielle Laporte, and the two I added on. So here’s my scribbled out version of moving forward, thanks to my anxiety.

Thanks, anxiety.

STEP 1: Face reality. “I’m anxious.”

I’ve hit a wall. These things that I’ve wanted in my life aren’t here yet. I know I have the power to create my life, and yet I feel powerless. It feels like I’m the mouse. On the wheel. Of desperation. To get anywhere but here.

STEP 2: Inquiry. “So, why am I anxious?”

I feel like I should be farther along by now. In everything. My career. My community. Love. The big ones. I’m in that place where it seems like nothing has really changed over the past year, five, ten, though of course, intellectually, I know it has. I’m feeling resentful that I work constantly only to feel like I’m getting nowhere, that in fact, I’m still behind. I believe I should have more to show by now, and I want someone to lean on in the process. I feel anxious that I’m still alone, that I don’t want to have to go out anymore to see people – I want someone waiting for me at home. That going out for drinks or chatting in cafes is hardly fulfilling. That I no longer want to be on the outside looking in.

STEP 3: Take responsibility.

I have these talents that I don’t take as far as I can. I’m hindered by those beliefs that I’m not a strong enough writer, or dancer, or funny enough, engaging enough, good looking enough. That I focus too much on the deep, and not enough on the trivial to do the kind of networking that it takes to make “it” happen. My belief system keeps me from getting what I want.

But these times of anxiety so intense I can’t seem to move actually transform me, even just the slightest bit. I’m getting there inch by inch.

STEP 4: Where do I go next?

Reevaluate what I want to focus on. Love, and ideas of it, are feeding me right now. Pay attention to where I feel the spark, the passion. Invest in those places, and not the ones that drain me.

STEP 5: How am I going to make that happen?

Pull collection of love stories together. Develop my inner witch. Let creativity lead me. Feed into my body. Get my hair did. Speak my truth. Apply for things I’m not qualified for. Write an e-book introducing people to holistic health. Have my hissy fit and then let it go.

How do you deal with your anxiety? Does it push you ahead, or take you under?

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