It's snowing somewhere

We find ourselves at that point of the year. You know, the busy, insane part that ends up looking like sitting in traffic to get the presents bought and dragging ourselves to every last holiday party even though we hit our breaking point on December 2nd.

Funniest thing about all these shenanigans is that it’s actually just about the best time of the year to sit and reflect. I believe, even as I book my tickets for 85 Xmas themed events over the next five days, that this is the true point of December/Winter/New Year’s. But somewhere along the way, we lost that innate tendency to reflect as our lives, and desires, took over. Some of us (my generation, ahem) have never known it any other way.

Which is why, when I received two little gifts of stimulating questions on Friday, coupled with a piece I wrote at BNT several weeks ago about developing a personal manifesto, I looked up at the sky and said, “ok, I get it.” Time to ponder 2009, and slowly and gently bring it to a close.

Friendly ghosts of holiday seasons past

Although the two gifts I received are seemingly different – one is from the Superhero Journal and is simply titled, A Completion Ritual for 2009, and the other is from Tripbase, via my friend and colleague Lola Akinmade, asking for my top three travel secrets – they seemed to meld together in a way for me that made sense to combine the two as a reflection of my year of Superherodom and Travel.

We all have a superhero in us, and a lust for travel, whether that be in lands far off, or simply within our families, towns, and selves. Do yourself a favor and set aside some time to do this little ritual. It will make 2010 all that more clear for you.

Completion Ritual

1. What do you want to acknowledge yourself for in regard to 2009?

I created a website (along with some help) that I love. I became a part of Brave New Traveler and the fantastic, always inspiring Matador team. I performed freestyle for the first time. I learned how to feel my feelings, but also watch myself feeling my feelings at the same time – big difference. I helped create a writing group, Kanimoch, and put on our first event, For the Hullabaloo of It (which was a raging success, in my humble opinion). I was approached about hosting a holistic health show. I pushed some boundaries around sex and intimacy. I began meditating regularly again.

Photo: The Naked Artisan

I performed the crazy and intense choreography of one of my favorite routines since the 9th grade, If (Janet Jackson), on a Sebastopol club stage, the freezing back deck at Mission Rock on the San Francisco Bay at midnight, and on the Tribal Fest stage in front of a roomful of amazing dancers from all over the world. I sold half my stuff, stored the other half in my friend’s storage unit, tucked my cat at another friend’s apartment, and took off. I saw old friends, many of which I hadn’t seen for years. I forgave them. I forgave myself. I wrote for many other wonderful blogs, including Dream Studies and Mooky Chick, and for Conscious Dancer magazine. I was lucky enough to have many wonderful people write for my webzine. I set up shop in Asheville (for the moment). I spent more time outside during the month of August in Truckee than any August since childhood. I lived with my parents for three weeks and none of us killed each other. I stuck up for myself in a friendship that was painful for me. I let go of someone I think I loved.

2. What is there to grieve about 2009?

I faced money issues (and am still fighting to face them) that are extremely uncomfortable for me, especially since I haven’t really had money problems in the past. I didn’t push myself hard enough around changing those money issues.

I felt alone. I never think my dancing is good enough. I’m still late most of the time. I realized that a romantic relationship wouldn’t heal my wounds, but I have hindered myself from both having one and deep connections with others. I still can’t seem to get a handle on something that might have happened as a child that I don’t fully remember. A couple of close friendships are ending. I look at others in my field and think they are so far ahead of me and wonder, why don’t I have the energy to do as much as they do? Will I ever? I sometimes feel like I ran away, and I will always run away. I didn’t make it to all the places I wanted to go, because I have yet to figure out how people actually balance travel and work. I looked at my friends marriages and kids and instead of feeling a pang of “I want that” I felt pangs of “Why don’t I want that?” I let go of someone I think I loved.

3. What else do you need to say about the year to declare it complete?

2009, you, my friend, were a wonderful building year. Without you, I wouldn’t know who I am, and you made that time between 2008 and 2010 that much more…um…buildinger. No, seriously, it was sweet.

Now, PEACE!

I declare 2009 complete…2010 is my year of being badass! (in a gentle, loving kind of way).

Three Travel Secrets

Above the Truckee River, a few minutes from downtown

1. Truckee, CA is kind of a love. Especially if you are a single, straight woman. I’m just saying.

Yes, it’s a horrible name. But besides that, it’s an amazing little hideaway off of I-80, with trees and water everywhere. Hiking right behind the house. Truckee River down the street for a perfect afternoon of sitting on a rock and letting the water come up to your knees, meditating on the tiny, rippling waves. Drinking beers (or other, gluten-free, beverages) as you float in a big, ridiculously expensive raft (but worth it) from Tahoe City toward Truckee. My favorite Mexican restaurant ever (I know, surprising) that serves up some seriously good flautas. An actual cheap and long-lasting rejuvenation option just 20 miles over the mountain at Sierra Hot Springs. And yeah, of course, it’s got that whole skiing thing happening in the winter for those of you into that sort of thing.

Ok, must stop before everyone moves there.

Ok, it's not the Castro one
Photo: calmenda

2. I’m not sure how secret this is if you live anywhere in the SF Bay Area, but hands down my favorite place for tea, yummy healthy food from around the globe, and sitting for hours, chatting with friends or typing away on a computer, is Samovar Tea Lounge. The one in the Castro, no doubt. Oh my God, I’m having Masala Chai tea pangs just thinking about it.

3. Sure, Asheville, NC gets all the love. Deservedly so, but there are certainly quite a few little towns in my home state (though far, far away from my hometown) that make this place worth settling into, for at least a little while. Necessity, and a bit of luck, got me to check out Black Mountain, about 20 miles east of Asheville. This funky, new-age-meets-Billy-Graham little town has a great mix of people, plenty of stores with crystals and homemade, organic soaps, all while having a Christian college up the street (and literally, Billy Graham’s retreat center just a few miles away).

Jollying it up in Black Mountain

I love the feel of working around the artists that call this mountainous village their home. I’ve only been here for less than a month, so still have a lot to explore. But running around the shops at the yearly Holly Jolly festival, chatting with the fun (and cute – but young) male baristas at the Dripolator, and taking in a show at the White Horse (where they actually have tables you can sit at! Good for my wary, almost 31-year-old feet) makes the place all that much warmer.

Ok, I trust that you won’t spread these secrets far and wide.

Your Turn

If you take on the challenge to close out 2009, looking back at your life, your travels, your ups and downs for the year, please come back and share it here, along with the Superhero Journal and Tripbase!

Here’s to a beautiful, fruitful, loving, and hope-filled new year…